What We Focus On Matters: A Mind-Body Perspective for ME/CFS and Chronic Illness
Introduction: The Power of Focus
What we focus on really matters.
Before diving in, let’s begin with a brief moment of grounding.
I invite you to close your eyes (if that’s comfortable), breathe in through your nose into your belly, and breathe out through your nose – ensuring that your out-breath is slightly longer than your in-breath.
This activates your parasympathetic nervous system – your body’s healing state.
Now consider this: you have the ability to make decisions that support you.
A quote from the film Vanilla Sky puts it beautifully:
"Every passing moment is another chance to turn it all around."
You can pause, ground yourself, and act from a place of trust – at any moment.
About Me
My name is Simon Pimenta.
I had fibromyalgia and CFS/ME for around 8 years.
At one point, I couldn’t walk for even one minute.
Through a range of mind-body approaches and practical strategies, I was able to return to work, play sport, and enjoy life again.
I now make content to help others living with ME/CFS, Long Covid, and related conditions.
This post is one of many tools to help you on your healing path.
Why What You Focus On Matters
Let’s explore this in a simple analogy.
The Two Wells
Imagine two wells in a field.
- The first well is full of stress hormones: adrenaline, cortisol. These are useful in emergency situations, but not when you're safe.
- The second well contains feel-good hormones: dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, endorphins. These support your immune function, healing, deep sleep, and wellbeing.
If someone keeps drinking from the adrenaline well, it becomes the easy path.
Weeds grow over the second well, making it harder to access.
This is a metaphor for neuroplasticity – the brain changes based on how we use it.
The more we use a pathway, the stronger it becomes.
So, the question is: which well are you drinking from?
Scenario A: What I Focussed On (That Didn’t Help)
When I had ME/CFS and fibromyalgia, I often:
- Woke up each morning scanning my body for symptoms.
- Obsessed over minor blemishes or sensations.
- Repeated my symptoms to everyone I saw in support groups.
- Became emotionally depleted from endless symptom-talk.
Even the social support settings became draining.
I started to realise how much time I was spending focusing on the pain, and how this fed a cycle of stress and frustration.
I also noticed how things like social media could trigger sadness or comparison – seeing others live vibrant lives or feeling stuck in resentment over unfair treatment.
This pattern of stress becomes habitual.
We keep drinking from the adrenaline well.
Over time, that becomes our brain’s default – but it doesn’t have to stay that way.
Scenario B: Choosing What to Focus On
Now imagine this instead:
- You wake up and meditate for one minute.
- (This can release serotonin, which regulates mood.)
- You recall something that made you laugh.
- (Endorphins – natural painkillers – are released.)
- You think of someone you love and send them a kind message.
- (Oxytocin, the love hormone, is activated.)
- You reflect on three things you did well yesterday.
- (Give yourself a pat on the back or a fist bump – this boosts dopamine, linked to motivation and satisfaction.)
This creates a virtuous cycle. You're building new neural pathways to the second well.
You can also practice gratitude, which has been shown to increase dopamine and serotonin.
Even three small gratitudes a day can begin to shift your baseline state.
The Good News: You Can Change the Pattern
When you notice a pattern – for example, “I check my body each morning and then feel worse” – you have the awareness to change it.
Just like with the two wells, when you stop going to the adrenaline well, the grass grows over it.
When you actively travel to the feel-good well, that pathway becomes easier and more natural over time.
What If?
Instead of focusing on what’s wrong, what if you focused more on what could make your day even a little better?
What if you used your limited energy to do something that helped your body heal?
This brings us to one final story.
The Parable of the Talents
Though I was raised Catholic (no longer practising), one story that stuck with me is the parable of the talents.
A master gave three servants varying amounts of money (called "talents"). One buried his. The other two invested theirs and doubled the return. The master rewarded the ones who invested their energy and criticised the one who hid his.
The message: whatever energy you have, use it wisely. Even small investments in joy, peace, or healing practices can yield meaningful results over time.
Final Thoughts
You have the wisdom to see the patterns.
You have the capacity to shift your focus.
And you have the power to build new pathways.
🌱 You don’t have to do it perfectly – just begin.
I'd love to know:
👉 What’s your biggest takeaway from this post?
Leave a comment to help others connect with this message. If you have questions, feel free to share those too.
I create regular content for people with ME/CFS, Long Covid, and related conditions.
Want More Help?
I could go into much greater detail about strategies to identify your personal stressors, but I have created a free training to help you do that.
If you would like this free training, get in touch - contact details below.
Put the word AUDIT in the message and I will send you the training.
Contact Me
If you have any questions, or would like to access the free resource mentioned above, you can contact me here
SIMON PIMENTA is a hypnotherapist, coach and trainer working with people to boost resilience and performance, and minimise stress.
After working in a demanding job as the Director of a Housing Trust, he went off sick and remained unable to work for the next 8 years.
He discovered a pioneering approach to resolving health issues and got back his health, and now trains others using these same techniques.
